December 01, 2011

Misplaced Treasure

We can know someone instantly by observing to where he allocates his treasure. If his treasure is money, we can observe by the way he spends it. If his treasure is time, we can observe his leisure time. If his treasure is his appearance, we can observe how much effort he put into it. Where your treasure is, that is where your heart will be.

And the heart is the core of a human being. You know that people who donate a large porportion of his money to the poor has his heart on them too. Those who spends a lot of his time on the gym, has the heart for body shape or health. And those who sacrifices a lot for his mate, has his heart completely on her. What matters most is not the treasure itself, but theheart that goes along with it. They are always attached to one another.

I find that sometimes we say that we love someone, yet finding it hard to spend either money or time for them. It is not hard to find a couple where his husband is reluctant to spend for his wife. Sometimes he prefer to buy car or gadgets rather than things that his wife wants. He keeps complaining that all the things she buy are useless and just a waste of money. Of course the wife needs to be able to manage the financial well too. What I mean is that the happiness of his mate seems not to be too essential for him as it should be anymore. The treasure I am talking too not merely refer to money. The same thing goes with time. Many married couple have a difficulty in having a good quality time together just like they are in courtship. They prefer to spend it to do the housework, working, or ‘refreshing’ with friends. It seems that the majority has misplaced their treasure in a wrong priority. No wonder many relationships become dry o(T_T)o.

We have no right to say ‘I love you’ when we do not mean to ‘I am willing to sacrifice for you’ and ‘you are my priority’. Your treasure cannot go somewhere else if your heart is truly in your mate’s lap. One common problem I have observed is that the husband prioritize to give money to the parents rather than to the wife. No no.. Giving money to the parents is a very very good thing. No doubt with that. Yet often the proportion are not equal. Never forget that when we get married, your ‘inner family’ is your wife and children J Your parents, siblings, cousins, etc are your ‘outer family’. I believe that when this is in the right order, all potential conflict can be minimized significantly.

Some also has tendency to work harder in order to provide more. Many travelled a lot or go to work in the morning and go home very late in the evening. There is a strong believe especially in Chinese culture that the man’s love is expressed through the money they provide from their sweat. Surely nothing wrong with that. Yet remember that your woman marries you not because of money. Yes, provide her physical needs well, yet if you don’t fill the relationship with intimacy, her love will wither. You don’t have to work more time in order to earn more. There are many alternative jobs which can give you freedom more and earn more too. When you are willing to protect your quality time with all your might, you can always find a way to be both a provider ... and a great lover J

It is not a secret anymore that money or possessions are the most occuring root of problem in marriage. Yes.. money is a sensitive issue. It can break any kind of relationship when it is misused. Thereby I think it is very necessary to take a common attitude about it from the very beginning. I heard one’s saying that he will not manage his sibling’s money for any kind of purpose. Why? He said, “Because money is sensitive. If the money losses, it can create quarrel between us.” We don’t want that certainly, do we? I think that it is a great idea to never lend money to your family or even close friends. It is wiser to help them to earn money, give them opportunities, and so on. Yes it takes more work to do. But I think I called it a discipline. The one that also protects your relationship J

It will be so sad to fight because of the misplaced treasures in our life. Where is your treasure now? Where is your heart now? I find that God never wants us to put any kind of treasure above Him. When other treasure sits on the throne of your heart rather than God, you can always find a trouble occurs. Even our spouse. Do you realize that they are the ‘Two’ and God is the ‘One’? I believe that as God keeps being the center of our lives, all these loving principles will fall rightly into its places. These will not become a hard work, a burden for us to do. Your heart will know what to prioritize as you keep your heart turns to God. Isn’t it amazing? God always ask us to rest in Him. Love Him passionately. Then He promises that He will give you the desire of your hearts. And let our desires ... can be placed at the right place, right time, just as God intend it to beJ

I have to admit that I came to a phase where I think of Jabrik too much :p (read: God becomes the ‘Two’) I think in other way that maybe this separation is a calling from God to draw nearer back to Him too. At the time we meet again, for sure we will do it rightly. Sometimes God calls you to the desert so that He can be your only oasis. Every thing that happens has a purpose, and the purpose will never to harm you. As I can see the work of God’s hands in this separation time, my strength is being recharged and my faith grows stronger that I can endure this well J If you feel that God is ‘taking’ what’s most dear to you now, it simply means that God misses you. It is time to come back. When you’re ready to make Him the One in all circumstances, He will gladly gives you the Two (read: lover). God ... is writing my love story. My life is the pen in His hands, all I can do is to believe that He is making a wonderful one in which mind cannot even imagine. Soon ... you will find that this turns out to be happy ending. It’s not being naive ... I call it ... F A I T H.

Why do I love Jabrik? Because he is my dream comes true #blushing :D Christmas season is always be my favorite period during the year. May we meet again on the Christmas day #hugs

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