Soon it will be Christmas :) Many people love this season for its beautiful lights, decorations, presents, tradition, and so on. I do love all those decorations too ;) No doubt about it :p I even built two christmas trees in my house. I love the Christmas' lights the most :D Some of us may also go abroad to spend their Christmas with consideration other place has more beautiful decoration and festivals. But what is actually the delight of Christmas about? I have found that inspite of those beautiful decorations, it will not mean so much more when you are not with people whom you love and with the birthday guy, Jesus Christ ;)
We tend to eliminate Jesus from Christmas celebration for we think that it belongs to Christian 'religion'. Yet Jesus did not born into this earth for the sake of creating religion. He wanted us to come back and build intimate loving relationship with Him so that we can truly experience life. We have to keep in mind that the meaning of Christmas is far away from the glamour lights of Christmas celebration, but in the love of God who is reflected in the life of Christ.It is the celebration of God's love and faithfulness to sinful human through the birth of a Savior of sins. The essence of Christmas is not on the trees, presents, lights, feasts, but in ... love God and love people. We do not love people once a year by giving donation at Christmas time. No, isn't love a daily walk? My greatest reflection on this Christmas is how far I have loved God and people? How can I love them more? I have come to a phase where I find that we can never truly experience joy outside of love. Hence, the Christmas delight is in love.
Dr. Gary Chapman in his book titled, "The Five Languages of Love" described that some people do have their primary love language. So many people get frustated to express their love in the way that their beloved could perceive them as love too. Many women complain that their spouse does not love her anymore, while the husbands state that they have done their job pretty good as their expression of love to their wives. So what is wrong here? Dr. Chapman pointed out that they are simply do not speak the same love language. Once we discover our beloved's primary love language, we can express our love more effectively and avoid misunderstandings. Wouldn't it be great? Why don't we learn our beloved's love language as our Christmas gift for them? Based on his research, he found out that people tend to feel loved in these five languages:
#1 Words of affirmation
#2 Quality Time
#3 Acts of Service
#5 Physical Touch
To identify our beloved's love language, we need to observe which language they tend to speak the best. If a person is easy to give gifts for others, most likely they also like to receive gifts the best since gifts are their primary love language. All people have these five, only with different orders. It is very important to do what is primary to them first rather than do the others. Imagine if the same person whose primary love language is gifts and last love language often receive a kiss and a hug from her beloved who never give her gifts.. She can still feel unloved!! Hence, to learn to speak your beloved's primary love language could be the best Christmas give for them :) And it is not for only in the Christmas season, but for every coming day. What a delight!
For some people they spell L-O-V-E with T-I-M-E. Yes we cannot say we love someone without giving our time. The popular words for this will be 'quality time'. The word 'quality' there is interesting for it emphasizes in the growth that occurs when we interacts with our beloved. There should be growth in intimacy, closeness, and joy. Two people can spend time together without saying a word for they are mad at each other. It cannot be categorized as quality time. The quality time is one of the most essential expression of love which has become so expensive in these busy days. Yet it is better to spend a few minutes and hours daily with our beloved rather than only spend one whole day on the weekend. Our daily interaction matters so much more than an event. The same thing goes with our relationship with God. How can we say that we love Him when we do not even set aside a fraction of our time to be in communion with Him daily? We do not do love when only we have time for it, instead we discipline our time to shower our love daily. Write Him a love letter. You will be amazed when you are finished. Interacting with our God can be so sweet, intimate, and loving that you can never imagine. Spice up your love life with Jesus! Especially on His coming birthday ;)
I observe that most men in Eastern culture cannot speak the love language of WORDS quite well. It is just not common in the culture and sometimes we feel shy to speak it loudly. We tend to keep compliments and give out critics. We are not used to say the three magic words: "I LOVE YOU" and this has become an obstacle many kinds of relationships. Children often needs the words of affirmation from their parents. A daily "I love you" will brighten up their day. You can be sure that when children feel loved and secure, they are least likely to be naughty. The same thing goes with our beloved. Be generous to affirm their goodness and strength. Shower them with compliments. Here is a note for men ;) It has been common to be heard that women tend to be weak on their ears while men tend to be weak on their eyes. Maybe that is why men lies and women put make up :p Well, true compliment is not a lie. It comes from a heart which truly adore and appreciates what it sees. Be sincere in your compliment and give it without particular intention. The more important the woman for you, be sure that you will give her more of your words of affirmation. Do not give it to all women without being sure that they will not misinterpret your intentions #wise.
Do you know that our God is such a poetic guy? He affirms our existence as precious ... we are the apple of his eyes. He carries us close at heart. Wow! How deep is our value for Him! And he affirms us so many times in his collection of love letters ... our Bible ;) Do not make your Bible become dusty. Grab, open, read it with such eagerness to understand what is He going to tell you. Get information how to understand bible. I am sure there are many sites available who can help you. Do not miss His priceless treasure. Do not miss a day without hearing His words of love for you :)
My primary love language is words of affirmation. That is why to hear compliments will definately boost up my spirit. That is why I also love to say, "I love you" and write love letters. For me words can lift up me so much but also at the same time can break me down too. There is nothing that can make me so unloved when people use defeating words for me. I understand the words best too. When you do act of service but do not accompany it along with words of affirmation, I cannot feel loved fully. I am telling this for you to be as an example how you can use this love language effectively. The goal is to speak other love language the best to make sure that they feel loved. For a love is not a love until it is perceived as love :) Here is my experience again.. My mom's primary love language is acts of service. For her it is when I help her to do household's jobs that can make her feel loved the most. Words without deeds for her does not mean so much. Although she likes to receive compliments, but I find that she likes better when I help her:) Knowing this, I can be better in expressing my love for her ;)
Other people may feel loved the most when they receive hugs, kisses, a gentle tap on the shoulders and holding hands. They perceive all these touches as 'love'. Of course in this matter, we cannot do this to everyone on the opposite sex. But be sure to do this to those who are in our family and lover. A new-born baby usually has an intense physical touch need. A baby can be sick more easily and even can be died when they do not receive any physical touch. Thereby physical touch is also essential for expressing our love with a certain condition and do it properly ;) Jesus used variety of ways to heal people. Sometimes he just spoke words and commands to heal paralyzed and sick people. Sometimes he touches them. Interestingly, one of His 'patient' whom He touched was a leprous guy who are well known 'not to be touched by anyone' because of his disease. Jesus knows that his greatest need is a touch of love. Thereby Jesus touched him so that he can be healed both physically and mentally :) Isn't He amazing?
Jesus speaks these five love languages over and over again to us. He speaks "I love you" everyday, He is always by our side any time, He give gifts to us.. the one that is far beyond our imagination and indescribably beautiful gifts, He served us so that we can serve others, and He touches our hearts gently, persistently, and faithfully to draw us nearer to Him all the time. How can we refuse to receive such kind of great love? If we cannot love Jesus who is all-perfect, how can we love imperfect human beings? That is why the genuine Christmas delight lies on this.. Love God and love people. Love your God with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your soul, and with all your strength. And love your neighbour as you love yourself. Never miss a day without experiencing such a delight. This Christmas may only be the beginning of exciting journey of love with Him. Some says that love is about falling in love over and over again with the same person. Fall in love always with God and you will gain the strength to pass His love for others too.
May this Christmas be filled with lots lots lots of love
in your life! :)