March 24, 2010
"When we judge people, we have no time to love them"
When we look at people for the first time, we tend to make impressions and assessing some of their attributes. It can be the way they walk, the way they talk, the clothing they wear, and a glimpse of their reactions toward issues. We put almost none effort to do that. It comes out naturally from our minds. This habit may become a great asset when we are jurries who assess the participants in a competition or employers who are going to select their employees. It will be a benefit for us when we can use it wisely at the right time and at the right place. But people tend to use this habit everywhere and anytime. They don't do this for the sake of the people they assess but somehow to satisfy the selfish desire and pleasure, named judging and spreading gossips.
It's kinda awkward actually when we make various assumptions regardless people whom we haven't known yet and fully believe that they are true. Making too many positive assumptions will make us naive, but making too many negative assumptions will make us grumbler. The point is simply do not judge a book by its cover. Do not judge people, especially those who are already being the outcasts. The outcasts don't need more judgement towards them since they have a lot already. They need our love and attentions. Sometimes we forget that.. they are also human with feelings, flaws, and imperfections. How dare we to label them weird, bad, ugly, etc with our narrow minds? Everyone has their own strugglings and reasons why they do things they do. Everyone has the rights to be the one they want to be. Human basic needs are love and acceptance. It would be unwise when we wish to be loved and accepted yet we do not love and accept people.
People may make mistakes. Everybody does. People have flaws. Everbody has. People are imperfect. Everybody is. Our self-righteousness sometimes blinds us from this simple truth. We think that we are better than the others then we have the right to judge them. The truth is we are not even better from them, worse maybe. There is no worse thing then judging people and think that we are better than them. Those who realize how bad they are tend to love more than those who think that they are good enough. Do you believe that? When we take position as a 'better' person we hardly feel love and emphaty toward others' flaws. We can only judge and condemn. We have no time to love them. Which kind of person do you want to be? A person full of self-righteousness yet cruel to others or a person full of selflessness yet love others? Which kind of person do you think that the world needs? Which kind of person that you will embrace as a friend?
This world doesn't need more judgement. We have all the sophisticated legal supported system yet we hardly find happiness there. We are living in a world that knows no grace. If you steal, then you must be punished. If you are weird, then you will be alienated. If you are not competent, then you will not be promoted. People must suffer the consequences of what they've done that might be considered wrong. Where is grace after all? Where is the love? Which one do you think may become answers to the world's problem? Do we need more laws or love? I believe that in the deepest in humans' life they simply need love. A wife becomes a great complainer without love from her husband. A child becomes rebellious without love from their parents. A criminal will keep doing crime since he doesn't know a world full of love. He only thinks how to survive in a cruel world. A prostitute won't become one if she can find another ways to survive. A family becomes broken when there is no love. Have you ever considered what is behind their faces? The strugglings they keep and the fake smile they share... yet all we do is judging without knowing the reasons why... Stop judging, love them, embrace them, and see the difference. Mind your own business. Treat people as the way you want to be treated. Let's create the world without judgement that knows grace and applies love. Let's answer what the world exactly needs! LOVE!