February 05, 2010
Wall of Pride
It's quite interesting that it's part of humans' nature to conceive the seed of pride within. We naturally stand up between two extremes, being completely independent from others or over dependent. Children usually have tendency to be over dependent to their parents especially to get their demands meet. When the parents fail to meet the demands, they would cry loudly, scream, or do anything else to force their demands to be fulfilled (I observe a lot children! =p). As the time goes by, there are two choices that will be choosen by every individual. Some will let go their childish behavior and have a huge desire to be independent from their parents someday; some will choose to remain spoil and childish because they are comfortable with it. But let's focus on the independent version for a while since it is closely related with the wall of pride I'm going to discuss about =)
Can you trust other to do the jobs that you are good in?
Can you delegate the tasks have been given to you?
Can you ask for other people's help to do certain matters?
Do you find it difficult to share your feelings with others?
Do you prefer to do work alone rather than teamwork?
Do you enjoy yourselves more while you're alone and hate when you are distracted?
Do you have tendency to keep the problems and try to solve it alone?
Do you concern for other people's matters and feelings?
When you answer 'No' to one of these questions, you probably has the unnoticeable wall of pride creeping inside of you. I'm not judging you. To be frank with you, I'm dealing with this problem and I think everybody does! That's why I call it is humans' nature =)
So, let's define first the pride itself. Pride is feeling of being better than others. This definition explains why is it so hard for us to delegate and trust tasks to others. We think that only us who can do that tasks 'perfectly'. Well, it is also the root of perfectionist character inside. Well maybe we can do it better, but if we don't allow others make mistakes then they will not grow. Again.. maybe we need to change mindset that it's not about MY performance, MY opportunity, MY group, MY ability.. but it's about THEIR performance, THEIR growth, etc. It's a matter of shifting our focus from self-centered minded to selfless minded. Great individual and leader always seeks what's the best for others and not for ourselves.
Pride is about 'I can do it by myself' mentality. Being independent is good, but being over independent is a disaster. C'monn.. we're created for community!! Try to accept that. We can't live alone. We can't live with others. No man is an island. So stop depending fully on your own strength, your own ability, etc and let us give a chance to others to do a favor for us! Saying "help" sometimes is as necessary as inhaling the breath. It eases our burden and make everything runs better. Trust me.
Pride is being exclusive. When we separate ourselves from community, try to be alone, and enjoy it much more than we relate with others, there's something serious we need to deal with inside. I mean.. everybody needs quiet time or me time to get relax for a while. But again if everytime is a me time will be a problem. You are designed to be a vessel of love and blessings. If we isolate ourselves from others, than how can the love and blessings be delivered? Include everyone in our relationship without differentiate them. Accept everyone as you want to be accepted. Even if we live in the different world, it doesn't mean that we don't have to be nice to them rite?
In the end, pride is a seed of self-centered life. It is a choice that we make everyday when we choose to defeat the pride and try to think others more than ourselves. It takes a long process to mold a character. Take courage and be determined will keep you on the path. The more achievements you get, the higher position you reach, the humbler you should become. It's the law of life. Pride is the seed of destruction, but humility gives the fruit of life. Embrace humility, refuse pride and self-centered life, and you're advancing more in life than others =)
by Leticia Seviraneta